Fresh from another whirlwind of grievances, Donald Trump is at it again, spinning tales about the California vote count in the 2024 election. Let’s just say that subtlety is not his strong suit, or perhaps he missed that lesson in the “How to Win Friends and Influence People” workshop.

So, what’s the scoop? In Trump’s world, where logic sometimes takes a backseat to the latest conspiracy theory, he’s trying to convince us that California “just stopped” counting votes to make it look like Kamala Harris swept the state more decisively than she actually did. Because, of course, the only explanation for a 3 million vote win is voter fraud, right? Except that’s not actually how math works.

In case you’ve forgotten, Trump squeaked out a win in the 2024 election by a measly 1.5% of the popular vote. And let’s not even talk about his home turf, New York, where he lost to Harris by 1 million votes. A reality check is in order, Mr. President.

It all started during an interview on Fox News when a host mentioned that Kamala received a staggering 75 million votes. Turning into a human question mark, Trump couldn’t help but scoff, “Well, if you believe the whole thing… the whole thing is ridiculous”. Oh Donald, can we get some popcorn for this show?

In a fit of early-morning rage, Trump took to his beloved Truth Social with a manifesto in all caps about California’s alleged failure to check IDs at the polls. Yes, it’s true that the state doesn’t require photo IDs, but this doesn’t mean an epic voter heist was underway. Get real!

California’s vote counting saga took longer than some other states, but it was all certified on time, thank you very much, Secretary of State Shirley Weber. Ironically, voter turnout in 2024 dipped to 71.4%, down from the historic 80.7% in 2020. If anything, the real scandal is voter apathy, not grand theft election.

Let’s take a minute here to revel in irony; if a few hundred thousand votes had swung differently, we might have dodged a far-right fever dream of a presidency. Instead, here we are, in the parallel universe where Trump still howls at the moon over a 2024 victory while clutching pearls over imaginary vote conspiracies.

As Senate Republicans trot happily along with Trump karaoke night, they should buckle up for a wild ride, especially now that conspiracy theorist Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. has taken the reins as Secretary of Health and Human Services. So, what are we left with? A bizarre power trip peppered with delusion, of course. Enjoy the show, America.