Hosting the NBA All-Star Game is no small feat for San Francisco, and this weekend, the city managed to pull off a relatively glitch-free event. No Waymo cars spontaneously combusting, no frenetic smash-and-grabs in Union Square, just a sleepy afternoon that culminated in, well, a basketball game that left us all in a dull daze.

Let’s talk about the All-Star Game itself, shall we? If you were hoping for a showdown of athletic prowess and killer highlight reels, you definitely picked the wrong event. The excitement fizzled even before the tip-off, and by the time the actual game started, it was clear it had the energy of a nap time for toddlers. Spoiler alert: Steph Curry saved the day with a stunning half-court shot, bagging himself the MVP award and giving us at least one glittering moment to cling to as the rest of the evening faded into obscurity.

The format this year? A mini three-game tournament that made about as much sense as a broken vending machine. Instead of a thrilling back-and-forth battle, we were treated to a lackluster 41-25 win in the final game. Yes, you read that right. In an exhibition meant to showcase the best in basketball, a team only managed to score 25 points. Can we take a moment to let that sink in while we compare it to last year’s score, 397 collective points? Talk about a major letdown.

Curry’s moment of brilliance was the lone beacon in this otherwise dreary affair. CBS Sports reported that the three-hour presentation featured roughly 30 minutes of actual basketball, proceeds which were likely more entertaining for those who stayed home and binge-watched a bad reality show. Even TNT’s farewell tribute dragged on longer than the games themselves, somehow stealing the limelight from the stars who had bustled all year to earn their All-Star status.

Draymond Green, ever the vocal critic, wasn’t shy about expressing his disdain for the format. He candidly rated it a zero on a scale of one to ten, saying, “Come on, what are we doing? This is ridiculous”. Too right, Draymond.

Even notorious San Francisco critic Charles Barkley chimed in, blaming the new-gen players for ruining the competitive spirit. Whatever the reason, it was clear this format fell flat on its face. At least Curry got to bask in the hometown glow, scoring 12 points to inch his way to MVP honors amidst the mediocrity.

Thus, while we can boast about a successful weekend for San Francisco on the hosting front, the 2025 NBA All-Star Game will likely fade from memory faster than a trendy new café serving overpriced avocado toast. Now, if only we could find a way to turn this all into a meme.