Karl the Clairvoyant Fog is your celestial guide through the hazy unknown! Buckle up, Bay Area stargazers - the cosmic vibes are serving up some serious tea today, and we’re here to spill it.

🐐 Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)

🔮 Forecast: Your ambitious energy is hitting differently today, Capricorn. That startup idea you’ve been mulling over? It’s time to pitch it to your tech bros. The universe is whispering, “venture capital awaits”.

💋 Sex: ☁️☁️ (Lukewarm cuddle season - Netflix and actual chill)
😎 Vibe: ☁️☁️☁️ (Confidence is high, but maybe tone down the LinkedIn flex)
💼 Hustle: ☁️☁️☁️☁️ (Networking game strong, venture capital dreams stronger)

🏺 Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)

🔮 Forecast: Your revolutionary spirit is bubbling up. Whether it’s a sustainable kombucha startup or disrupting corporate wellness, your weird ideas are about to become someone’s next funding round.

💋 Sex: ☁️☁️☁️ (Polyamorous planetary alignment)
😎 Vibe: ☁️☁️☁️☁️ (Peak San Francisco quirky aesthetic)
💼 Hustle: ☁️☁️ (Innovation brewing, execution pending)

🐟 Pisces (February 19 - March 20)

🔮 Forecast: Emotional intelligence meets tech empathy. Your sensitivity could be the secret sauce in designing that next-gen mental health app that actually understands human complexity.

💋 Sex: ☁️☁️☁️ (Sapiosexual vibes activated)
😎 Vibe: ☁️☁️☁️ (Dreamy but grounded)
💼 Hustle: ☁️☁️ (Creative potential simmering)

🐏 Aries (March 21 - April 19)

🔮 Forecast: Your aggressive energy is perfect for coding sprints and startup pitches. Today, you’re not just thinking outside the box - you’re setting that box on fire and building something radical.

💋 Sex: ☁️☁️☁️☁️ (Passion level: startup founder)
😎 Vibe: ☁️☁️☁️☁️ (Unapologetically intense)
💼 Hustle: ☁️☁️☁️☁️ (Hustle mode: maximum overdrive)

🐂 Taurus (April 20 - May 20)

🔮 Forecast: Financial stability meets creative disruption. Your practical nature might just birth the next sustainable fashion marketplace that actually pays artisans fairly.

💋 Sex: ☁️☁️ (Sensual but selective)
😎 Vibe: ☁️☁️☁️ (Grounded cosmic energy)
💼 Hustle: ☁️☁️☁️ (Steady progress, no burnout)

🌟 Gemini (May 21 - June 20)

🔮 Forecast: Communication powers activate! Your multi-hyphenate skills are perfect for that podcast/newsletter/consulting gig combo you’ve been dreaming about.

💋 Sex: ☁️☁️☁️☁️ (Flirting is your superpower)
😎 Vibe: ☁️☁️☁️☁️ (Chaotic good energy)
💼 Hustle: ☁️☁️☁️ (Networking ninja)

(Continued in next response due to length)