Picture this: Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez are about to throw the most ridiculous wedding bash that screams “we’re richer than your entire zip code”.

With a guest list more star-studded than the Hollywood Walk of Fame, these tech oligarchs are basically hosting the ultimate “look at us” party while the rest of America struggles to make rent.

The Guest List of Privilege

Oprah? Check. Katy Perry? Yep. Kim Kardashian? Obviously. Even Trump’s family got an invite, because nothing says “we’re totally not problematic” like partying with the MAGA crowd.

Bernie Sanders’ Burning Critique

Meanwhile, Senator Bernie Sanders is out here calling out these “modern-day kings” who collectively own more wealth than half of America. Bezos, Musk, and Zuckerberg are basically sitting on a mountain of cash while workers fight for basic living wages.

The Ultimate Power Move

Bezos and Sanchez aren’t just throwing a wedding; they’re making a statement about their place in the new American oligarchy. Attending Trump’s inauguration, schmoozing with MAGA elites - it’s like they’re playing 4D chess while the rest of us are stuck playing checkers.

So grab your tiny violins, folks. The billionaire wedding of the year is coming, and it’s going to be more extra than your wildest dreams.