Just when you thought immigration bureaucracy couldn’t get more chaotic, the Department of Homeland Security decided to send an email that screams “administrative apocalypse”.

Imagine being an immigration lawyer and suddenly receiving an email telling you to self-deport in seven days - even though you were born in Massachusetts. That’s exactly what happened to Nicole Micheroni, who found herself caught in a bureaucratic nightmare that would make Kafka proud.

A Digital Deportation Disaster

The email, which reads like a poorly executed phishing scam, was sent out broadly without clear instructions on who exactly needs to pack their bags. CBP claims they’re terminating parole for individuals without “lawful status,” but the communication was about as clear as San Francisco fog.

WTF is Even Happening?

The kicker? The email landed in the inbox of a US citizen, suggesting DHS’s digital communication skills are roughly equivalent to a toddler’s attempt at sending an email. Experts are calling this a “completely overloaded” and confusing process that could terrify immigrants who might not understand the nuanced legal language.

The Real Immigration Rollercoaster

While this might sound like a bureaucratic fever dream, it highlights the increasing uncertainty and anxiety surrounding immigration policies. Micheroni’s sardonic response - wondering about Italian citizenship through great-grandparents - perfectly captures the absurdity of the situation.

In true Bay Area style, we’re left wondering: Is this what happens when AI starts writing government emails?